When idle or totally disinterested in what surrounds me, I sink into this totally different current... My mind goes all adventurous and happy or awfully slow and miserable!
And in this very oblivion I wrote...
In this flood of emotions, I am disillusioned by my surroundings... Blinded by the conventions of responsibility, security, obligation and certainty, I forget to 'value' myself...
It is hard as hell to live a life that isn't mine, a life that depends on 'should-Be's'...
I want to be in this place where i know what i want from life...
I want to stop doing what others do... be it the smallest possible choice, i want it to be entirely mine!!
I'd be nothing but a coward if i just 'exist'...
I am pulled between want and need every single day...
Why should it be so hard to decide? Why don't i just BE...?
Tofu Neat Balls
1 year ago
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